wall talking

just to post this:

don't you agree with that?
:p

future story

Had i lived a life worth telling?
Had a life a normal life?
Or extraordinary?
Had I even had a life?

Questions I may asked in the future.
When my grand daughter suddenly ask,

"granny, what was your life like?"

Then only I shall begin my story.

To think back. Yes, I lived a life. Just like every living creature do.
What did i do today? I watched Batman. It hit me there. How humans are easily fooled by a no one.
Even the greatest kind-hearts would slaughter for their owns. How easily the well-planned villains die because of their greed.

There i thought. We all carry the deadly sins. These that turns back against us. There i know. The devil only said the right words. It is our actions and need that condemn us.

I am trying as hard as I can to control me. But sometimes, a lot of things took over me. my ego, my greed, my lust, my emotions. Like every other human. Hey, why do you think John Lennon was shot? He didn't even know his killer.

All because of selfishness. All because human are selfish. I am too I admit. And when I saw the movie, I asked myself, what would I do if I was in the ferry? There it is just you and death. You decide. You do it yourself and bear the consequence. Nothing else helps you. Not your workers, not your bribed policeman, not your money, Not your fame. Just you. You choose to pull the trigger.

So lets not ask who is who or what is what. if my grand daughter ask me the question one day. i'll simply say;

"I lived a life full of good and bad. Just like you. Maybe for a different reason. Maybe a different content. But the same skeleton. Where sins run free and deeds are nearly extinct. Where I share my joy and tears and pray to god for peace and serenity. Where I play hard just to live another day"

my ugly facts

Here I am.
Finally finding something to write about me.
Ive been doing some self-reflection.
Here's a true fact about me.
Facts that only those who study me knows.

Im an egoistic bitch.
My ego range from 40% to 70%.
Depending on the people.


I hate cute-actors.
Mind what i say.
I didnt mean cute looking people.
I meant people that always act cute.
If it were legal, I'd go kill them all.

I hate attention seekers.
They are always bitches.
They always want what's yours.

Im a jealous brat.
I get jealous all the time.
I only show it to certain people.
People I care especially.

I love to hate.
I can hate someone for stupid reasons.
Mostly related to my life.

I get annoyed easily.
Especially with those I really care
Also for simple reasons.
They always give me bigger troubles.


I love holding grudges.
It makes me grin with satisfaction.
it makes me seek for the best revenge.

I don't like lectures on who i should be.
I think they should go die.
Or maybe they should try lecturing themselves.

Im easily attract.
Sometimes it gives me trouble.
But natural attractions are hard to ignore.

I don't like people wandering around my belonging.
I don't feel safe when they do that.
I keep my belonging secure.

I easily feel threatened.
So i tend to not trust anyone.
It takes time for me to do that.

I hate guys that hit girls.
I think they are useless.
I think they don't deserve to have a girl.

I dont like my copy-cats.
It is annoying.
i don't see it as a compliment.
i see it as a disgrace.

I can change myself.
In order to keep my belongings.
but i won't change for a no-one.
It also takes time.
So fuck it, be patient.

I don't like waiting.
It always turns me off.
Only Nad has the best idea to get me on track.

I tend to repeat my mistake.
It is my weakness.
Please accept me as I am.
And please be aware that it's not always.

I hate threats.
They should just do it.
Rather than filling me with uncomfortable.

I love sorry.
But it's hard to swallow in.
I can't change in a second.

I can be okay when I feel like it.
So nobody pushes me.
Or it'll just worsen.

I try to be less jealous.
I should get trust.
I will in some time.
But please bare with me until I do.

music is her everything.

Im so touched by this one. A blind young girl, her only entertainment is the piano. She only speaks to the piano, She hears the piano. Not intentioning to ignore the world and what she had become. She never intend to quit. Music is her everything.


Guys, this is touching.

this wishlist

I just envied my own wallpaper. I found this beautiful picture of gretsch. a white falcon. well, gretsch are born to be lovely. But this is my wishlist. Its what i want. If i have this guitar, then i wouldn't ask for another guitar. haha. Okay fine. maybe another gretsch. But this is totally irresistable.

Would you just look at this precious thing. And having to see it but not touching it is even more painful. Gosh, when will i own it! haha. Fellas, this is gretsch. Don't ask me why it's so beautiful. It is made to be lustful. Im already lost of words. Anybody care enough to get me one? Haha. It only cost a couple thousands. Well, it's cheaper than a car for sure. Look at its every aspect. And wait till you hear it. Freggin, Why do people create such guitar in such expensive price?